There are countless times when you find yourself in a situation that calls for you to consider someone else’s point of view.
You may be trying to settle a disagreement with a friend, make decisions with a partner, or work through a challenge with a colleague.
Seeing things from another person’s perspective can be challenging, but it can become second nature with some practice and the right approach.
The Perceptual Positions Process
One technique I’ve found particularly useful in navigating these scenarios is the ‘Perceptual Positions Process.’
I’ve used it successfully with my clients and in my life. It can help you understand where someone else is coming from and give you the tools to find common ground. Let’s walk through the steps:
1. Your Perspective
The process begins with examining the situation from your perspective. Ask yourself some questions to dig deeper into your thoughts and feelings. What are your needs and desires? What are your priorities? How are you feeling emotionally about the situation? This step is crucial because it helps you establish a baseline for where you stand and what you want to achieve. Spend some time reflecting on your goals and concerns. It’s okay to take notes or journal about your thoughts. This step will help you articulate your position more clearly, which can lead to a better understanding of the situation overall.
2. Their Perspective
Now, step entirely outside your experience and into the other person’s shoes. This might be easier said than done, but it’s an essential part of the process.
Try to imagine what the other person is thinking and feeling. What might they want out of the situation? What could be motivating their actions? Take some time to truly empathise with them. Put yourself in their position and imagine how you would feel if you were in their place. By doing this, you can understand their perspective more fully and identify common ground.
3. Neutral Perspective
Lastly, imagine you are an unbiased, objective third party observing the situation. Step into this neutral space and consider how a stranger might see things. This can be helpful because it allows you to detach from emotions or personal biases and view the situation more objectively. What might an outsider notice that you and the other person might have missed? Are any potential compromises or solutions that become apparent from this vantage point? By considering the situation from this impartial perspective, you might discover new ways to approach the problem.
Takeaways
The Perceptual Positions Process is a great tool for helping you develop empathy and navigate difficult situations. It encourages you to consider different viewpoints, which can lead to better decision-making that considers everyone’s emotions. Ultimately, this process can guide you toward making the best decision for everyone involved. By practising this process regularly, you may notice a shift in how you approach conflicts and decision-making. You’ll become more attuned to the needs and desires of others, which can improve your relationships and interactions with those around you. You’ll also gain a clearer understanding of your own goals and priorities. It’s worth noting that this process can be challenging at first, especially if you’re not used to considering other perspectives. But don’t be discouraged—like any skill, it takes time and practice to become more proficient. Start small and give yourself time to get comfortable with the process.
Additional Resources
If you struggle to apply the Perceptual Positions Process, other strategies and resources can help you along the way.
For example, conflict resolution techniques can be valuable for navigating challenging conversations and finding mutually beneficial solutions.
Do you still want to dive deeper into the ENGAGE model and assess your skills against its principles?
You can find a free assessment here. This can help you gain insight into areas where you excel and identify areas for improvement.
In conclusion, the Perceptual Positions Process is a versatile and effective tool for building empathy, understanding, and connection. By practising this technique, you’ll be better equipped to navigate life’s challenges and cultivate more meaningful relationships.
So, next time you face a disagreement or a difficult decision, try this process. You might be surprised by how much it helps you see things in a new light.