Hey there! Have you ever felt stuck in your ways at work? Maybe you’re more of the quiet type, or perhaps you and your coworkers don’t always agree. But guess what? Change is always possible, my friend!
How We Learn Interpersonal Skills
Sure, we all have unique ways of learning new skills. Some are visual learners, while others thrive on hands-on experience. But when it comes to those oh-so-important interpersonal skills—like becoming an Engaging Executive—we tend to follow some pretty common patterns.
Let’s examine these patterns more closely and see how they can help you become a master of the interpersonal arts.
Unconscious vs. Conscious Incompetence
You can’t fix what you don’t know is broken. It’s like trying to navigate in the dark without a flashlight. This is what we call Unconscious Incompetence. But once you flip that switch and realise there’s a whole world of skills waiting for you, the real magic begins.
Teaching someone who is aware of their shortcomings and eager to grow is like watching a flower bloom fast-forward. These folks are on the fast track to becoming the leaders they’ve always dreamed of being.
But let’s not sugarcoat it: Realising you’ve got room to grow can be a bit of a gut punch. This is what we call Conscious Incompetence—the painful realisation that you’re not quite where you want to be. It’s like stumbling through a maze in the dark, but trust me, there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Stick with it, and you’ll come out stronger and wiser than ever, maybe even as an Engaging Executive.
Next, we’ve got the stage where things start to click, but you still need to work hard to achieve the desired results. We call this Conscious Competence. Finally, after plenty of practice, your new skills become second nature. Welcome to the promised land of Unconscious Competence, where doing things comfortably and naturally is second nature.
But hey, don’t just take my word for it. This is backed by another learning model.
The Three Zones
When it comes to learning new skills, there are a few “zones” you might find yourself in. First up is the Comfort Zone—everyone’s favourite cosy corner. Here, you stick to what you know, doing what you’ve always done. If you’re content with the status quo, this is where you’ll stay. But beware: Staying put might mean missing out on some career opportunities.
Then there’s the Stretch Zone—the sweet spot for those hungry to grow and learn. Here, you push yourself outside your comfort zone, embracing the discomfort of the unknown with open arms. Whether practising small talk with strangers or honing your leadership skills, you’re expanding your horizons and loving every minute. And here’s the kicker: The longer you stay in your Stretch Zone, the more your Comfort Zone expands to accommodate your newfound skills.
Lastly, there’s the Overwhelm Zone—the land of burnout and exhaustion. In this zone, you push yourself too hard, taking on more than you can handle and leaving yourself frazzled and depleted. Trust me, this is not where you want to be. You might see some initial progress, but it’s unsustainable in the long run.
So, where’s your sweet spot? Find your Stretch Zone and settle in—it’s where the real growth happens.
Ready to shed some light on your Unconscious Incompetence regarding interpersonal skills? Take our FREE ENGAGE Questionnaire and start your journey toward self-improvement today.
And if you’re craving some inspiration, check out a success story from our program here.
Now, go forth and conquer those new tricks!